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The die is cast; I have consented to return if we are not

destroyed. Thus are my hopes blasted by cowardice and indecision;

I come back ignorant and disappointed. It requires more

philosophy than I possess to bear this injustice with patience.

September 12th.

It is past; I am returning to England. I have lost my hopes of

utility and glory; I have lost my friend. But I will endeavour to

detail these bitter circumstances to you, my dear sister; and

while I am wafted towards England and towards you, I will not

despond.