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Then came that dreadful night-was it really only last night?-when

she played so badly, and my heart almost broke. She explained it

all to me. It was terribly pathetic. But I was not moved a bit. I

thought her shallow. Suddenly something happened that made me

afraid. I can't tell you what it was, but it was terrible. I said

I would go back to her. I felt I had done wrong. And now she is

dead. My God! My God! Harry, what shall I do? You don't know the

danger I am in, and there is nothing to keep me straight. She

would have done that for me. She had no right to kill herself. It

was selfish of her."